The CrackBerry Chronicles Of San Francisco

Written by Elaine Santore. Posted in Arts/Entertainment, Culture, Events, Opinion, Politics

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Paul Pelosi Jr., Elaine Santore, and Jennifer Siebel attended the unveiling
of Francesco’s rock at the de Young Museum, April 24.
Photos by Luke Thomas

By Elaine Santore


The Heart of San Francisco presents the rock of her faith

Every time Fog City Journal ventures to District 1, we step into some sort of parallel universe. Thursday evening was no exception.

Angela Alioto invited FCJ to the de Young Museum for the unveiling of Francesco’s Rock, a small piece of rock used by St. Francis to rebuild the Porziuncola in Assisi, circa 1208, that will be used as a symbolic corner stone for Alioto’s replica chapel project in North Beach.

Angela Alioto gazes at the 800-year-old Francesco’s Rock
with San Francisco Archbishop George H. Niederauer.

The rock will be moved to the completed National Shrine of St. Francis at the corner of Columbus Avenue and Vallejo Street.

What about Joe?

Police Commissioner Joe Alioto Veronese emceed the event. Veronese introduced a group of local schoolchildren, who each took turns speaking to the audience in their native language including Angela’s granddaughter, Chiara Mia Veronese Lind.

Chiara Mia Veronese Lind represents Italy.

Joe Veronese helping out one of the children, Jose, who got a bad case of stage fright.

I hadn’t seen Veronese since he dropped out of the District 3 State Senate race.

“You haven’t heard the last of me,” he told Fog City Journal.

“Are you running for president?” I asked. Or maybe vice president?

CrackBerry: On holy ground and acting wholly ridiculous

Much to my surprise, future First Lady Jennifer Siebel actually agreed to have her photo taken with me, proving that she’s a good sport and doesn’t ignore FCJ like her fiance Mayor Gavin Newsom.

Remember, Gavin: Luke’s camera loves you because you’re pretty. And you love Luke’s camera because it makes you pretty. You’re totally wasting the pretty.

Mayor Gavin Newsom (left, with fiancee Jennifer Siebel) talks about how bad he needs Botox in order to get chicks.
Where did Newsom get that idea?

Siebel said that she liked my outfit (I didn’t detect any sarcasm). She told FCJ she’d just come back from the set, and that the brownish haircolor she was sporting wasn’t permanent.

“I see you guys!”

Newsom took some time to chat with a young fan and future voter, a girl named Mia who was representing Austria during the presentation.

(CLICK HERE: Gavin Newsom’s 2020 Property Taxes Are Delinquent On BOTH Of His Estates)

“Do you go to Austria often? Are you an outdoors person?”

“Class of ’97”

My secular and religious worlds truly collided when I spotted Monsignor Harry Schlitt. I knew him when he was just Father Harry, my pastor while I was a student at St. Gabriel Elementary. At least one of us is upwardly mobile.

Monsignor Harry Schlitt and Elaine Santore.

Maybe someday I’ll go back to my alma mater and give a Career Day speech called “How to become a notorious nobody” or “How to write about politics without really writing about politics.” That would be epic.

The Scientologists are onto us

The President of the Church of Scientology of San Francisco, Jeffrey Quiros, wanted his photo taken with me. Quiros recognized me because he found that photo BFF Aaron took of me posing in front of the church. Awkward.

Elaine Santore and San Francisco Church of Scientology President Jeffrey Quiros.

He suggested that I visit the church sometime, and write a story about “Anonymous.” But I think I’ll stick to making fun of politicians.

D3 candidate alert

During the event FCJ was introduced to District 3 Supervisor candidate, Lynn Jefferson. (I would give you a link to her website, but it’s “under construction.”)

Maria Zocca, D3 Supervisor candidate Lynn Jefferson, Giovanni Zocca,
and North Beach Chamber of Commerce Executive Director Marsha Garland.

North Beach Chamber of Commerce Executive Director Marsha Garland told Luke that Jefferson is one of the top 3 contenders. I’m guessing the other two contenders Garland’s talking about are David Chiu and h. Brown.


Dede Wilsey + Angela Alioto = too many divas in one room

I find Dede Wilsey fascinating and horrifying all at once. That’s all I’m going to say.

Dede Wilsey and Angela Alioto.


Elaine Santore

San Francisco Oligarchs, Elitists And Gatekeepers:

Janet Reilly

Clint Reilly

Ed Lee

John Molinari

Roger Boas

Dick Blum

Vinod Khosla

Anybody named Haas

Charlotte Maillard

Ed Shultz

Henry Kissinger

Will Hearst

Nancy Pelosi

Dianne Feinstein

Kathryn Feinstein

Scott Weiner

Darcy Brown

Stewart Brand

Joseph Costello

Carl Livingston

Henry Adams

Wally McCormick

Bob McKeen

Jean Bricker

Richard Thieriot

Wilkes Bashford

James Bronkema

Roger Boas

William Ball

Gordon Bellis

Frances Bowers

Donna Casey

Gretchen Cebrian

Tina Cella

Lawrence Chickering

Sheldon Cooper

Charles Crocker

Edwin Cutler

Myron Du Bain

Coburn Everdell

Donna Ewald

John Gamble

William Gaylord

Richard Graff

Reid Hoffman

Ann Getty

Anthony Hale

Matilda Kunin

Wendy Linka

Mary Moulton

William Newsom

John Owsley

Bokkara Patterson

Juan Reynal

Steven Swig

Charles Thieriot

Wilfred Von Bulow

Michael Whitman

Brayton Wilbur

Rita Barela

John  Brunelle

John Calori

William Coblentz

Joseph V. Costello

John Diefenbach

Myron Dubain

Frank Woods

Mort Feld

T. Jack Foster Jr

Gordon P Getty

James Gilleran

John Goy

Evie Haas

Bryan Hemming

John Jacobs

Fritz Jewett

Ray Jones

George Keller

Art Kern

Bob Lansdon

Arthur Latno

Robert Leefeldt

Bob Lurie

Malcom MacDonald

Dan McCall

Wallace McCormack

Rich Miller

Elizabeth Pfau

Forette Pomeroy

David Ringler

Hadley Roff

Norman Rosenblatt

Albert Schlesinger

Steven L. Swig